We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
