Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
