He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I FOUND THE LEGS
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
