Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize