Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
