he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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