so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Naked Twister starts at high noon
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
