I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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