Don't you send me to vm
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
