Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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