thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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