the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize