so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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