Apparently you make a good broom.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
