Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Randomize
