hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
