i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
