she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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