i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
