We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
The air taste purple.
Randomize
