bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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