using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize