dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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