At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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