plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
