drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize