Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm having to shit out rocks
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