your parents love me but you hate me
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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