What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Two words: nipple clamps
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