ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
