The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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