wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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