remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
