Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
