so explain again why im purple
no
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
