I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
