if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
