I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
You left your phone here
Wait...
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