ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize