I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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