I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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