I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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