she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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