"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
