I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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