Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
