At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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