i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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