We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
