Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
