Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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