the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
